Remember that time when the ASSHAT SAINTS SCOFFED AT THE 14K GOLD CHARM BRACELET NELSON GAVE JEANETTE THAT ENDED UP WITH HER SISTER SORRY I’M NOT SORRY THAT I’M YELLING BECAUSE YES I AM EFFING YELLING. THIS IS FOR YOU, KIDS, JUST FOR YOU.

Anyway, REMEMBER THAT??? YOU DIDN’T THINK IT WAS REAL, YOU ROLLED YOUR EYES, SHARON RICH PROBABLY MADE THAT UP TOO RIGHT, YEAH, OKAY.

HERE’S THE LINK TO THE LETTER. THIS IS EXACTLY AS IT WAS LAID OUT IN MADELINE BAYLESS’S PRESENTATION. She owns the gold charm bracelet now. I’m trying to be calm and it’s not working.

READ IT AND WEEP, JERKS. PLEASE DON’T TAKE OUR WORD FOR IT.

PERSONALIZED CHARMS. INCLUDING ONE OF MEN’S UNDERWEAR WITH A HEART SHAPED PADLOCK ON THEM. BECAUSE THAT IS THE SORT OF THING YOU GIVE THE WOMAN WITH WHOM YOU ARE HAVING WILDLY SATISFYING AND MOST EXCELLENT SEX.

Picture of Eddie Nelson on the back (well, okay, they bungled his name but even the layperson who saw this realized that it was, in fact, not Gene Raymond’s unfortunate mug in the picture).

http://www.ebay.com/itm/Actress-Jeanette-MacDonalds-Sister-Elsie-Scheiter-Jewelry-Photos-Description-/171805811819

Here’s the charm bracelet presentation from the Mac/Eddy Club Meeting of June, 2013:

I can’t even, right now. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

HA.